When Heroes Fall

**I’m using the word “heroes” here instead of “heroes and heroines” in my understanding that “hero” is not an exclusively masculine term, for the sake of simplicity.

You’ve undoubtedly heard all about the Epstein files, and may have had certain reactions to discovering how many times Deepak Chopra appears in them. If your algorithms are “tuned to the spiritual dial”, as mine are, it’s all anyone’s talking about. And it’s understandable. No one wants to see a person very comfortably assuming the position of role model and teacher, if not outright spiritual guru, be implicated in… well, the beyond-disgusting world we’ve come to associate with Epstein but is of course much more pervasive than that, and with whomever else might be on one particular list, no matter how devastatingly long this particular list is.

Devasting, but not shocking. Is it? We know that all is not right with the world – far from it. We’ve known for a long, long time, and we wonder how long things have been so… toxic, backwards, wrong, evil. We’ve been uneasy, and to equal degrees, we’ve been gaslit in more ways that we can wrap our heads around to believe that the world we’re living in is as it should be. Our senses have been dulled, our minds have been manipulated and controlled… and to some degree, we might acknowledge we’ve been walking right into this state of affairs, eyes wide open.

We find ourselves in a situation where we’ve allowed ourselves to be coddled and “protected” by forces who, as it turns out, would not hesitate to mislead or harm us, or, in the case of Chopra, at the very least present a version of himself greatly at odds with certain aspects of his character. Why did we do this? Why do we do this? For many reasons, but mostly, because it was/is convenient, and the path of least resistance. But also, many among us simply believed that those in positions of power and leadership, and also those elected by the people to serve and protect the people, have been genuinely interested in doing their jobs well, and ethically.

We have believed, as a matter of course, that there is value in having “heroes” – role models, gurus, leaders who show us the way. And that we can’t find the way without them.

Why do we have heroes? Where does what we can essentially call hero worship come from?

This is a very complex question, of course, but I think we can agree that when we, as individuals and cultures, adopt heroes, it is because we are looking outside of ourselves for whatever it is we are seeking: answers, meaning, protection, to be saved, and so on. And why do we do this? because we feel helpless, vulnerable, scared, powerless on our own.

This is the crux of the issue. This is what needs to be reckoned with if we are to heal and move forward as a people very clearly in a moment of crisis.

Of course, we want to hold the Deepaks and Epsteins of the world accountable. Of course, we want to do every single thing we can to ensure that no one – no child, especially, but no one, no one! – is ever harmed again as they have been, repeatedly and gruesomely, for so long, as they continue to be this very minute. But it is imperative to this end that we stop creating the conditions that allow these subserve, subterranean worlds from thriving, unseen and insipid.

We have to become thoroughly sickened by societies built on hierarchy, in which glaring examples of difference and othering are the norm: higher class and lower class, leader and the lead, hero and the hero worshipper, teacher and student.

Us and them. Me and you.

I don’t mean by this that that there is no room for students to learn, teachers to teach, leaders, even, to lead. In an ideal world, the teacher knows that they are always learning; the student knows that their own heart is their ultimate teacher, guiding them to the teachers who can help them along their path; and leaders know that their calling is less to lead than to serve.

We are not, right now, living in this ideal world, not by a long shot, though we can find some examples of this beautiful, ideal scenario, and some beautiful, realized beings on this planet. To achieve more of this, we must come to recognize that a fallen hero, in addition to being a decoy, or distraction away from even more gruesome realities being hidden to help the powerful maintain their power, is simply a highly publicized “device” that serves to perpetuate the appealing myth of the hero.

In other words, when we hear of fallen heroes, we can either scramble to immediately turn our gaze to heroes not yet fallen and place our authority there, or we can finally recognize that we are the hero of our lives.

We are the hero.

No one has walked the path we have walked. No one knows better than we do what is true, what is real, what is good, and what we need. We are here as souls in embodied form specifically to live out a unique life no one has ever before lived. No one has a de facto justification for being placed on a pedestal, or in any position of authority over us, whether they are forcing their authority over us, or if we think we are choosing to give it to them.

It might look like we have chosen. We might feel we chose to read Deepak’s book, to attend his workshops, watch his lectures on YouTube, place trust in him. And to an extent, this is true, or can appear to be true. It takes an extraordinary amount of effort to become utterly discerning in recognizing all of the cultural forces that have created a society that almost demands hero worship at every turn.

This celebrity. That athlete. This public figure. That guru.

In so many ways, we are crafted, created, designed, even, by forces greater than us, and it takes a lot of work to figure this out, dissect what these forces are, and extricate ourselves from them, if we’d like to. It’s also true that we cannot ultimately separate ourselves from anything outside of us, including these forces. Change yourself, change the world – we hear this spiritual truth often.

Instead of losing our minds trying to figure out whose fault it is that we lie here, broken an untrusting, confused and hopeless, without rudders and lost at sea, we can start to believe that there is a way out of this chaotic storm.

If we are part of the mess, we are also part of the solution. It truly is a giant web connecting us all. This is not about fault, but about recognizing the parts of ourselves that can connect with what we despair over in the world, and the parts of us that are uniquely equipped to see ourselves – to love our way through.

We can take some time and dwell with the confusion, not so that it subsumes us, but so that we can confront it with the unflinching gaze of the hero determined to transcend the times we are in. We can fully, bravely encounter the feeling we have in this moment that the madness of the world will never be resolved. That the madness of our inner world – the heart – will never be resolved. We can stop trying to untangle the mess of what is what, and let the feelings we are experiencing wash over us… and through us. Only we can do this. Only we can, with the greatest love and compassion, unleash what has been buried within for so long… and this is why we are the hero of our lives.

Slowly, from here, we can cast our gaze out from our broken but utterly loved selves, and turn to others who are also emerging from the wreckage of their devastated selves, looking for connection and the joys and triumphs that come from sharing in both our pain and our hope. We can learn to trust again, one step at a time, because our hearts have been shattered, broken open, and they know how to lead us. We might notice that we won’t find ourselves grasping for promises others might try to make about our salvation, but for the simple, sublime, truth of loving connection.

We will understand that we are the heroes, and in our connection with others, heroes among heroes. We will learn as we teach, teach as we learn, and invite wisdom everywhere we find it. We will allow love to seed, grow and nourish us. It will feel inconceivable to harm another, or to allow another to be harmed. We will not give our power away. We will celebrate not hierarchy but difference, because difference – diversity in every single way – is the fabric of our manifest world. We are all incredibly unique, heroic aspects of Source experiencing itself through us, through every single one of us, equally and purely. If there is something more heroic than finding and living in the very heart of our human experience, I don’t know what it is.

Love, Tammy